GRACIAS, POOTAS

thanks for all the support over the past year, plus!

LOVES IT!

in the gutter

guess what my mind read when I read the headline below (see the red arrow)?

the grass is not greener...

Most of you who have been longer-term readers of mine know that I'm still fairly new to the singles scene after my recent divorce. It's been almost seven months since my relationship ended. And I guess you could say I've been dating for the past guess I'd say three months since I've been in SF. It can get dicey. Is it fun all the time? Not so much, no. But I'm in it. I'm gonna stick it out.

I often get more than a little incensed when I get a blow off from someone. Not entirely because I don't like rejection. I mean sure, that's a big part of it. Come on... I'm human. What can I say? Being rejected is not fun. But more often than not, it has nothing to do with me. I mean sure, if you don't like my hair color or the style in which I dress, that's pretty personal. But I can't help it if I'm merely being me. For me to be myself is an imperative. So while it is seemingly about me, it's not really. It's about you- you are just not that into what I have to offer. Nothing mean about it. It is what it is.

But when I'm on this side of the fence, daddy no like. I know first-hand that it is not fun. But I am also beginning to realize that I may be in a minority of folks who would like to be told a flat-out NO instead of being chased around the bush while you beat it and are indirect and just keep pushing me out until I finally give up.

Today I was forced to remember that the grass is not greener on the other side of the proverbial fence: Today I disappointed someone.

It was not the first time and it won't be the last. Like I said, I've recently found myself on the receiving end of disappointment on a few occasions. I am sure I will again. Probably too many times to count. But it's part of it, right?

But today I decided to be up front. I decided rather than say, "sure, I'll go out with you again" and then dodging phone calls and emails until the other person gave up I said, "sure, but just as friends, ok?" It felt both bad and good. I was direct, polite and there's no false pretense. My integrity felt good. I am not so sure the other person felt so good about it. I also don't know how disappointed he really was. But from the short remainder of our conversation, I'd imagine he was just a little bit. I know how that feels. It's not fun.

I don't like to disappoint people. But I value being direct and honest in a kind way more than avoiding the truth and stringing people along. Am I the only one out there that feels like this? Many times, I feel as if I am.

Maybe I should just put a mirror on the other side of that fence...to remind me of the view from the other side.

paging Mrs. Seacrest-Lauer, your repression is calling.....

WATCH THIS (<-- link)

(suitable for work, totals)

i can't even touch this...

even I think making a comment on this would be in poor taste.

I think it's actually pretty cool.

Mobile Test

testing mobile, y'all

LET'S RIDE, CLYDE!

I got my information packet on AIDS/LifeCycle 6 (<-- link) y'all.
I'm super stoked! They have a cool feature in which I can create my personal ALC webpage. (<-- link)


And, what? Huh? What's that you say?

You can DONATE money in my name to the San Francisco AIDS Foundation? (<-- link) That's CRAZY. Where?

HERE (<-- link)


[Gina's Note: I should have clarified. Although I am ambitious, I am not riding this year. Visit my ALC home page to find out more about how I'll help...and how YOU can too!]

hmmphhhh....

"she's got 3 or 4 problems..."

"she's got her cuckoo panties on..."

"she's cuckoo-bananas...."

"she's cuckoo for cocoa-puffs..."

"she good -n- crazy..."

A Star is Born

i need a little inspiration

but I'd settle for a little of his perspiration...





This is his spread in this month's Men's Health.
I highly recommend picking up a copy for yourself.

And I found this shot on the web.


oh Gerard, I'm getting closer...

i have been orientated

Last night me and my buddy Bunky (<-- link) went to Orientation for new volunteers for Habitat for Humanity San Francisco (<-- link). As it wont in these type situations, we were asked to go around the room and introduce ourselves and give a brief sound bite about why we were looking to volunteer.

As you might expect, you heard a lot of "give back to the community" and "put some of my free time to a more meaningful use". But some peoples' reasons were a little less thinly veiled.

**********************************

Legal Lady Eagle said, "...I would, umm, like to, umm, learn some basic, umm, carpentry skills to, umm, umm, use in my own, umm, home. Umm, I would also like to, umm, meet, umm, like-minded people."

Legal Lady Eagle likely meant, "I am looking for a man who is handy and has a big cock, because I am single, I'm in my mid-thirties and I am in danger of becoming 'crazy cat-lady'."

**********************************

Semi-Hot Business Suit Man said, "I work as a real estate developer in the city. We are often involved with developments which require a subsidized housing component. I would also like to give back to the community and would be interested in learning about and helping in site selection."

Semi-Hot Business Suit Man likely meant, "I work as a real estate developer in the city. I am hoping this will look good for me in my career and I can ink some killer deals with government grants/subsidy. I'm also hoping I can kick it to Lady Legal Eagle. I'm handy alright... handy with this big cock. I'm just sayin'..."

**********************************

VERY Young Male said, "I, uh, was recently arrested. And I have to do community service, so I am here to do some community service."

[NOTE: here is where Bunky had to stifle laughter and I thought I might have to kick him in the shins...]

VERY Young Male likely meant, "I, uh, was recently arrested. And I have to do community service, so I am here to do some community service."

**********************************

Ultimately, does it really matter WHY they are there, as long as someone in need can benefit from their labor? No. I think not to those in need as long on someone benefits from their being there. For them personally - who knows? Probably. But then again, my read is pure conjecture and is really for humour. I have no fucking clue. So yeah, you shouldn't probably listen to me at all. I quite often talk out of my ass.

hmmmmmm...

i think if i knew a little about the electrical power grid system, it might be quite interesting

i want muscle

And I am not the type to get excited about cars.
Much less muscle cars...
But these badboys are sexy!

Update: Ok, so I'm chatting online with my buddy and I came clean with him, so I will with all of you too... I am SO not a car person, but this car gets me HOT. It also makes me want to drive around nekkid.

sign-o-the-times

So I love conversation hearts. They are, to me, Valentine's answer to Candy Corn. YUM.

Our goofy department at work bought individual boxes of Necco brand "Sweethearts" and gave them to everyone. I was a bit taken aback at the discovery of one of the messages on the hearts:
I feel like this is a commentary on our current social situation. Don't "Call Me", don't "Kiss Me", just "Email". It's quick, it's easy, it's surfacey. Sure, if you live cross-country, fine. But I am beginning to feel like everyone (ME INCLUDED) is a bit too off-line phobic. Meaning, so many people appear to prefer the impersonality of hiding behind a computer screen over in-person interaction.

Get to know me across the interweb? SURE.

Have coffee with me? NO WAY.... Too personal!

WTF?

So instead, get out there in person, people. Shove your tongue down someone's throat. Grab a crotch.

BE ALIVE

KISS ME

my newest husband

ok - I know I said I was marrying that dude from Survivor (<-- link).

But I'm over him.

New V-Day, I need new meat.

Enter Mister 2007 (v1.0, at least...)

Gerard Butler, y'all:


In his new role as leader of Sparta in
Warner Brother's production of Frank Miller's Graphic Novel: The 300. (<-- link)

love stinks, yeah yeah... (part 2)

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

*Credit: A Washington Post competition for 2-line rhymes, in which the first was to be the most romantic; the second, the least (via my right-coast betch, Stack!)

love stinks.... yeah yeah! (part 1)

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe "go to hell".


*Credit: A Washington Post competition for 2-line rhymes, in which the first was to be the most romantic; the second, the least (via my right-coast betch, Stack!)

ba ba ba-da ba ba ba-da-da

Do you know the way to San Jose?
I've been away so long
I may go wrong and lose my way
Do you know the way to San Jose
I'm going back to find some piece of mind San Jose -a
L. A. is a great big freeway
Put a hundred down a by a car
In a week - or maybe two - they'll make you a star
Weeks turn into years and quickly pass
And all the stars there never were a parkin' cars and pumpin' gas
I've got lots of friends in San Jose
Wo oh oh oh
Can't wait to get back to San Jose
Wo oh oh oh
Do You know the way to San Jose?

I do. It takes me two hours. Door-to-door. ONE WAY.

HATES IT.

say it ain't so...

what good is sitting alone in your room? come here the music play... Life is a Jack-a-ray old chum, come see how Jack is GAY!

Mary J Blige Live at the 2007 Grammy Awards

MJB turns this MUTHA OUT!

HOLY FUCK

So... it's no secret I'm not a fan of the recent Google convergence with Blogger and YouTube. I have been gnashing teeth as I can't get videos on YT to post to Blogger automatically as I once could, before I migrated to the newer version of Blogger. [enter extreme anger stage left]

I got all wrapped up into it and FINALLY figured out why.

1. I had neglected to update my login info ON YouTube. Yes - user error. I'll admit it. It happens. But....

2. so i updated my info. STILL get the error that the username/password is wrong. ARGH! I started poking around. Before the new version of Blogger came out of beta, it was called Blogger(beta). Well... it's now just called Blogger. But YouTube doesn't know that yet. I had to FOOL YT by deleting my blog, then re-adding as Blogger(beta) which its not, really.

But until the geniuses figure that one out, for the time being, I think I can successfully post from YT to my blog.

FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC!

HOORAY

It's official -




I'm gonna be a "Roadie" y'all. Traveling the whole route, on a volunteer basis. I can't wait.

Oh yeah, also official... I can't have children. I'm one barren bitch.

what the fudge?

Why do some of my friends' blogs seem to have new posts, while others seem to have reverted back to "previous versions" where it looks like they haven't posted since last week, although I KNOW they have?

Could it be because Blogger SUCKS MY ASS?

or is it because Blogger is FUCKING LAME?

new movie crush

ok. I've always thought he was handsome. I even watched that dreaded Broken Hearts Club movie a few times because of him ( & Dean Cain... YUM).

Timothy Olyphant. HOT!!!

Last night, Gina & Bunky went to see Catch and Release. It was cute, if not completely formulaic. I didn't expect any different. But it was pretty good. I try not to analyze chick flicks too deeply, because there are lots wrong with them.

But as we were leaving the theatre, I wondered to Bunky...

Ok. Romantic comedies. They are carefully scripted, beautifully cast (appearance-wise, not always talent-wise mind you!) and create a fairy-tale world of love and romance. And true, very few people will ever experience those sorts of moments.

or will they?

Those who read my blog regularly might have noticed that I seem to have been "storming" emotionally over the last 2-3 months since my move. I liken it to the storming phase most teams go through in their development. It's nothing to be alarmed about. I believe it is normal evolution. Progress. Growth. Growing pains. Although it's not all fun, it is all "good" as they say.

I also think the reverse of an old saying is true. We often hear "the calm before the storm" said. Well, for me, I always have a storm before the calm, meaning, I always feel like I have the greatest occlusion before I gain clarity. Or, to keep in our meteoroligical analogies, my emotional skies always tend to be cloudiest and darkest right before they part and the sun shines down.

But I digress slightly (what's new?). So I was rambling on about perfect romance moments and movies and does anyone ever get to have them?

I THINK WE CAN. I think it requires a paradigmatic shift in ourselves. No, it's not ever going to be perfectly blocked and lit. Your paramour won't have deliciously dewey eyes that seem to glow like a 40's starlet (unless you hire an amazing crew). And unless you have a secret playlist ready on your iPod, you won't have the benefit of a score to rouse your heartstrings.

But you will have moments. Life is filled with them. And they all happen as they happen. Not as they are supposed to. AS THEY HAPPEN. It bears repeating - not as they are SUPPOSED to. This ties back to the whole expectations mumbo jumbo I keep wrestling with... sometimes not so well. If we expect these moments to be like the movies, then surely we will be disappointed.

Let's look at it from a slightly different angle: forget that it's scripted, scored, edited, lit, etc. That movie scene is merely a snippet out of someone's lives. You're seeing their moment. To them, it is happening as it is happening. It is what it is - and in that - it is in and of itself perfect. The same thing happens to you and me every day of our lives.

So if you are fortunate enough to have someone special in your life... think about this. Or let me "borrow" a made up scene. David - forgive me.....

So David is at his house in Memphis. Cameron has been away on a trip. Cameron gets a ride home from a colleague (give me poetic license here guys). Cameron comes in the back door, sets down his bags and David is just coming into the kitchen to get a glass of water. Their eyes meet and they smile. They've missed each other. They each close 1/2 their distance to one another, hug, and kiss tenderly hello.

Now, no offense to this scene, but is it the stuff chick flicks are made of? Not by studio standards, no. But what it IS is a scene from David and Cameron's life. It was their moment. And they experienced it, as it happened. And that moment was perfect for them. No lighting was needed, no score made it better, no dialog necessary. It happened. But it is romantic and loving and sweet.

All we have to do is "wake up" and see this happening all around us every day. Instead of using that romantic comedy to fuck up our notions and set our 'bars' unrealistically high, use them to reset our minds and open ourselves up to the beauty of life happening around us.

Yeah - kinda a heavy post for 7am PST. But... it's what was on my mind. With me, just like in life, you get yin and yang, good and bad and specifically with me... the fluff and the heavy.

I've mentioned moments quite a bit in this post. Last night with all this bubbling in my noggin, it brought to mind the lyrics to my favorite song in my favorite Broadway Musical.

Show: Into The Woods
Music & Lyrics by: Stephen Sondheim
Song: Moments in the Woods

The show is a metaphor for life (the Woods) - in which the famous fairy tales and fables of The Childless Baker & His Wife, Little Red Riding Hood, Cinderella and Jack and the Beanstalk (and the Giant) all come together to face the challenges of life... wants, desires, needs. The Baker's Wife has just had a 'moment' with one of Cinderella's princes.... and doesn't understand how to frame it, so to speak. So that's why some of the lyrics seem crazy (i.e., witches, giants, princes). But if you stay with the pass, you'll understand... (only certain parts included. for the whole song, google it).

BAKER'S WIFE:

Just a moment,
One peculiar passing moment...
Must it all be either less or more,
Either plain or grand?
Is it always "or"?
Is it never "and"?
That's what woods are for:
For those moments in the woods...

Oh, if life were made of moments,
Even now and then a bad one!
But if life were only moments,
Then you'd never know you had one.

First a Witch, then a child,
Then a Prince, then a moment-
Who can live in the woods?
And to get what you wish,
Only just for a moment-
These are dangerous woods...

Let the moment go...
Don't forget it for a moment, though.
Just remembering you've had an "and",
When you're back to "or",
Makes the "or" mean more
Than it did before.
Now I understand-

And it's time to leave the woods.

errol, you make me laugh

so my blog-buddy Errol had this on his blog.


I'm re-appropriating along with my comment.

I love this kind of base humour.

i need balls

PLUS

may equal:

this could get quite interesting before it's all said and done....

pier 14

i needed to clear my head at lunch today, and had my camera at work for some other, random reason and decided to take some pictures... yet another reason living here does not suck. because it's hella-pretty, yo!

the sweetest day ever

might have been February 5th, 2004...
the day the love of my life was brought into this world.


Happy 3rd Birthday, my beautiful baby girl. You'll always be my one true love.

2007Feb05: Work Plan

Show up.
Make a Difference.
Influence Events.
Change Lives.
Go Home.
Love my Dog.
Sleep.

Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

It's a noble trade I ply... being an almost 'office superhero' of sorts. It's boring, but it's part of my life.

shiny happy puppies treading sand

These are two happy pups. You'd be happy too if this was your playground for the afternoon:





Some of the pics are blurry b/c the sun was so bright. All were taken from my Treo, so not a proper phone. But this is the Pacific Ocean as witnessed on Ocean beach, in my home, San Francisco. I'm coming back sans dog, con iPod and a book.

aural tastebuds

I like to think that I possess some what of a varied and sophisticated taste in music:

- I like classical… from the super conventional classical (Dvorak, Barber) to contemporary American Classical (Berstein RULES!) to 20th century atonal stuff (think Berg, Schoenberg).
- I like Rap - I clearly prefer female artists, but I gots some essential Jay-Z and LL on my 'Pod.
- I like some Broadway/Showtunes. Not much, but some.
- I like R&B (Mary J.'s a tight bitch, Xtina - bitch has MAD vocal skills.).
- I like what I'd call 'newish' rock-n-roll (Fall Out Boy, The Killers, etc.).
- And I'm open to new stuff. A burgeoning friendship has begun to introduce me to Yo La Tengo. So far so good on the YLT tip. WHEEEEE!

But I do have some low brow tastes… just like my humor.

So I worked up a February playlist that is insanely diverse. And an "oldie" (not really, but the song is not new) came on a moment ago and I was at my desk bopping up and down in my chair feeling like a 16 yr old Italian girl, jumping up on her bed in her WHITE ON WHITE bedroom in Long Island, I was so excited and into the song.:

Love At First Sight - Kylie Minogue from her album, Fever.

Someone walked by when we were at the chorus (yes, honey - we - me and Kylie were GETTING' AFTER IT)

"baby when I heard you
for the first time I knew
we were meant to be as one……………"

Thank god I was just silently mouthing the words. But holy fuctards, Batman, does that song make me want to be in a convertible with a fresh ice-cold DDP*, maybe tooling down the sunny-as-hell PCH to nowhere in particular? That would be a little slice of Heaven…sheer Heaven.

----------------------
* Diet Dr. Pepper.. mmm. hellz yeah.

finally, it has happened to me. right in front of my face, my feelin's can't describe it.

SO (buttons on a shirt as two of my friends always say to me. think I use "so..." too much?) ...




After talking about it ... (<-- link)





and talking about it ... (<-- link)




and talking about it some more ... (<-- link)



without further adieu, lesbians and germs, GinaBruce - along with the fine folks at Room & Boredouttamyskull - present to you


MY MOTHERFUCKING COUCH --- KRACKOW!

LOVES IT BITCHES

have i mentioned lately

HOW FUCKING LAME THE NEW LAME-ASSED, FUCKING USELESS, NON-WORKING BLOGGER IS?

HOW SINCE GOOGLE BOUGHT BLOGGER, BLOGGER IS EVEN MORE LAMER THAN EVER BEFORE?

HOW MUCH I HATE BLOGGER?

HOW LAME BLOGGER IS?

HOW SOMETIMES MY CREATE A NEW POST SCREEN THE DEFAULT VIEW IS "COMPOSE" AND OTHER TIMES IT IS "EDIT HTML"?

HOW BLOGGER SEEMS NOT TO CARE THAT THE NEW BLOGGER IS SO COMPLETELY BUGGY ON FIREFOX?

HOW LAME BLOGGER IS?