i have been orientated

Last night me and my buddy Bunky (<-- link) went to Orientation for new volunteers for Habitat for Humanity San Francisco (<-- link). As it wont in these type situations, we were asked to go around the room and introduce ourselves and give a brief sound bite about why we were looking to volunteer.

As you might expect, you heard a lot of "give back to the community" and "put some of my free time to a more meaningful use". But some peoples' reasons were a little less thinly veiled.

**********************************

Legal Lady Eagle said, "...I would, umm, like to, umm, learn some basic, umm, carpentry skills to, umm, umm, use in my own, umm, home. Umm, I would also like to, umm, meet, umm, like-minded people."

Legal Lady Eagle likely meant, "I am looking for a man who is handy and has a big cock, because I am single, I'm in my mid-thirties and I am in danger of becoming 'crazy cat-lady'."

**********************************

Semi-Hot Business Suit Man said, "I work as a real estate developer in the city. We are often involved with developments which require a subsidized housing component. I would also like to give back to the community and would be interested in learning about and helping in site selection."

Semi-Hot Business Suit Man likely meant, "I work as a real estate developer in the city. I am hoping this will look good for me in my career and I can ink some killer deals with government grants/subsidy. I'm also hoping I can kick it to Lady Legal Eagle. I'm handy alright... handy with this big cock. I'm just sayin'..."

**********************************

VERY Young Male said, "I, uh, was recently arrested. And I have to do community service, so I am here to do some community service."

[NOTE: here is where Bunky had to stifle laughter and I thought I might have to kick him in the shins...]

VERY Young Male likely meant, "I, uh, was recently arrested. And I have to do community service, so I am here to do some community service."

**********************************

Ultimately, does it really matter WHY they are there, as long as someone in need can benefit from their labor? No. I think not to those in need as long on someone benefits from their being there. For them personally - who knows? Probably. But then again, my read is pure conjecture and is really for humour. I have no fucking clue. So yeah, you shouldn't probably listen to me at all. I quite often talk out of my ass.