new movie crush

ok. I've always thought he was handsome. I even watched that dreaded Broken Hearts Club movie a few times because of him ( & Dean Cain... YUM).

Timothy Olyphant. HOT!!!

Last night, Gina & Bunky went to see Catch and Release. It was cute, if not completely formulaic. I didn't expect any different. But it was pretty good. I try not to analyze chick flicks too deeply, because there are lots wrong with them.

But as we were leaving the theatre, I wondered to Bunky...

Ok. Romantic comedies. They are carefully scripted, beautifully cast (appearance-wise, not always talent-wise mind you!) and create a fairy-tale world of love and romance. And true, very few people will ever experience those sorts of moments.

or will they?

Those who read my blog regularly might have noticed that I seem to have been "storming" emotionally over the last 2-3 months since my move. I liken it to the storming phase most teams go through in their development. It's nothing to be alarmed about. I believe it is normal evolution. Progress. Growth. Growing pains. Although it's not all fun, it is all "good" as they say.

I also think the reverse of an old saying is true. We often hear "the calm before the storm" said. Well, for me, I always have a storm before the calm, meaning, I always feel like I have the greatest occlusion before I gain clarity. Or, to keep in our meteoroligical analogies, my emotional skies always tend to be cloudiest and darkest right before they part and the sun shines down.

But I digress slightly (what's new?). So I was rambling on about perfect romance moments and movies and does anyone ever get to have them?

I THINK WE CAN. I think it requires a paradigmatic shift in ourselves. No, it's not ever going to be perfectly blocked and lit. Your paramour won't have deliciously dewey eyes that seem to glow like a 40's starlet (unless you hire an amazing crew). And unless you have a secret playlist ready on your iPod, you won't have the benefit of a score to rouse your heartstrings.

But you will have moments. Life is filled with them. And they all happen as they happen. Not as they are supposed to. AS THEY HAPPEN. It bears repeating - not as they are SUPPOSED to. This ties back to the whole expectations mumbo jumbo I keep wrestling with... sometimes not so well. If we expect these moments to be like the movies, then surely we will be disappointed.

Let's look at it from a slightly different angle: forget that it's scripted, scored, edited, lit, etc. That movie scene is merely a snippet out of someone's lives. You're seeing their moment. To them, it is happening as it is happening. It is what it is - and in that - it is in and of itself perfect. The same thing happens to you and me every day of our lives.

So if you are fortunate enough to have someone special in your life... think about this. Or let me "borrow" a made up scene. David - forgive me.....

So David is at his house in Memphis. Cameron has been away on a trip. Cameron gets a ride home from a colleague (give me poetic license here guys). Cameron comes in the back door, sets down his bags and David is just coming into the kitchen to get a glass of water. Their eyes meet and they smile. They've missed each other. They each close 1/2 their distance to one another, hug, and kiss tenderly hello.

Now, no offense to this scene, but is it the stuff chick flicks are made of? Not by studio standards, no. But what it IS is a scene from David and Cameron's life. It was their moment. And they experienced it, as it happened. And that moment was perfect for them. No lighting was needed, no score made it better, no dialog necessary. It happened. But it is romantic and loving and sweet.

All we have to do is "wake up" and see this happening all around us every day. Instead of using that romantic comedy to fuck up our notions and set our 'bars' unrealistically high, use them to reset our minds and open ourselves up to the beauty of life happening around us.

Yeah - kinda a heavy post for 7am PST. But... it's what was on my mind. With me, just like in life, you get yin and yang, good and bad and specifically with me... the fluff and the heavy.

I've mentioned moments quite a bit in this post. Last night with all this bubbling in my noggin, it brought to mind the lyrics to my favorite song in my favorite Broadway Musical.

Show: Into The Woods
Music & Lyrics by: Stephen Sondheim
Song: Moments in the Woods

The show is a metaphor for life (the Woods) - in which the famous fairy tales and fables of The Childless Baker & His Wife, Little Red Riding Hood, Cinderella and Jack and the Beanstalk (and the Giant) all come together to face the challenges of life... wants, desires, needs. The Baker's Wife has just had a 'moment' with one of Cinderella's princes.... and doesn't understand how to frame it, so to speak. So that's why some of the lyrics seem crazy (i.e., witches, giants, princes). But if you stay with the pass, you'll understand... (only certain parts included. for the whole song, google it).

BAKER'S WIFE:

Just a moment,
One peculiar passing moment...
Must it all be either less or more,
Either plain or grand?
Is it always "or"?
Is it never "and"?
That's what woods are for:
For those moments in the woods...

Oh, if life were made of moments,
Even now and then a bad one!
But if life were only moments,
Then you'd never know you had one.

First a Witch, then a child,
Then a Prince, then a moment-
Who can live in the woods?
And to get what you wish,
Only just for a moment-
These are dangerous woods...

Let the moment go...
Don't forget it for a moment, though.
Just remembering you've had an "and",
When you're back to "or",
Makes the "or" mean more
Than it did before.
Now I understand-

And it's time to leave the woods.