picks, pipes and metronomes

I had an impromptu accoustic guitar lesson with Esteban, the famed classical guitarist, last evening. I had to go on a small scavenger hunt to find where I had put my picks. I had them in a bag, the contents of which included spare strings, my bag of picks, my old crack pipe, an electronic tuner and a metronome.

I was stuck in that bag for a minute. What gauge pick should I learn on? Is that residue smokeable? The only thing I knew for sure is that the metronome wouldn't click slow enough to guide me in my chromatic scales.

And then I remembered something clever an old acquaintance once said: "those who live in glass pipes should not smoke houses".