Inside Pride

So linking around from newer folks reading my blog (welcome!), I make my way to other blogs that I prolly would have never found on my own. This is one of my favorite aspects of blogging, exposure to new things, points of view and more funny gay men. If there are two stereotypes that are true about the gay community, that I personally do not view as being negative, they would be:

1) a disproportionately high percentage of gay men are funny
2) a disproportionately high percentage of gay women are better than me at mechanical activities

So today is Gay Pride Day in New York City and most other major metropolitan areas around the country (possibly the world? I have no clue...). And those of you who visit my blog on a regular basis know I don't normally type long posts. I like to keep it short, sweet (if not vapid) and pithy. But today I will depart from the norm. But let me preface that by saying that it's just my opinion, take it or leave it. Identify with it wholly, partially or not at all. Just another point of view and that's another thing I love about blogging and the First Amendment. I am free to say this... so here goes. Oh yeah, I will likely have some footnotes, so bear with me... You'll see this. (#) And if that's not the proper way to document, sue me, I'm not an editor or proofreader.

I was linking around (as mentioned before) to various blogs and I back-tracked to a blog from a handsome guy in Richmond, VA named Kelly's (1) blog: Rambling Along in Life...with a Stern Point of View (<-- link!) . I read around a bit. It seems that he found a nice picture and challenged his readership to post this picture in honor of gay pride:

And I do think it's a nice picture, with perspective on both flags, a pictorial for inclusion, side-by-side, etc.

Then I found my way to a post (2) (<--link!) on a blog, speaking to marriage, equality, blending in, etc. And right now, I am TOTALLY paraphrasing, so I'm not quoting anyone - just stating my own point of view. A caller in to a podcast comment line apparently spoke to his view concerning the need for the GLBT community to educate hetero-america, because, again, in his view, most cannot see past what they envision happening in our bedrooms, to see us as normal humans, and that we are a part of the fabric of this culture and society. I would tend to agree with him, on a macro level and having not heard his whole pod-comment (3).

I started out planning to write about my personal views on Pride Parades; however, when I came across the challenge, the post, the comment, they all sort of fit together with what I wanted to say (3) :

I live just outside of NYC. I avoid Gay Pride weekend with a passion that most use to attend it. I am not self-loathing. I am fairly well-adjusted, if not a little cranky at times. I live my life 100% out in every facet, in every moment of every day. I have been lucky to have jobs in corporate america where no one seems to give two shits about my propensity for sex with men. I have a pretty divergent group of friends. Most are heterosexual.

One of my friends I met while on a project, in Nashville, TN. She is a wife, mother of 2 beautiful children and a woman who is strong in her Christian faith. She knows I don't favor organized religion and gets it that I also harbor a strong suspicion of the whole American Christian God-concept. But she loves me anyway. She is one of the sweetest and kindest-hearted people I know. And I think she probably prays for me on a semi-regular basis. Do I believe in prayer? Not for me. But do I condemn you for it? HELL to the NO! (4) I think good energy is good energy. And again, while I am suspect on most things Christiamerican, I know Q's heart and soul are in exactly the right place. She has true faith. She believes, and if she is willing to devote some time every now and then to willing good energy into the universe in my name or directed to my pagan heart, then I'll take it - I can use all the help I can get!

All of this to preface my closing - I agree on educating Christiamericans and other "blind" Americans past our sexual proclivities. And I think there are real ways to do that. And I don't believe that helping others see the common denominator in any way stifles independence, creativity, individuality or any other wonderful aspects of what I think is critical to my "homosexual" core. Stay with me, I'm taking a hard right here....

If we have pride, I think it is great. I have pride in being a member of my biological, nuclear family - we're some crazy fuckers, but I love us. I have pride in being a man. I have pride in being a homosexual. I have pride in being a pet lover and owner. I have pride in being a loyal friend to those I love. I am busting at the seams with pride (just look at the size of my ass if you don't believe me!) (5) But every year, if we continue the same media loop of coverage from the various pride parades and celebrations, or worse, continue to accept and not challenge and demand better, how are we not contributing to a self-fullfilling prophecy? How are we not spoon-feeding the heterosexual community images of exactly what they already think we are? If we cannot show them the common denominators between us and them: flesh and bone, heart and soul, human emotion, dignity and desire for basic rights and respects, how do we ever expect them to find it on their own, past the sequins, hairspray, harnesses and chrome?

I do not have ESP. I do have ESPN, although I don't really ever watch it. Point being that I have no way of knowing what the pictures in tomorrow's papers of today's parades will be. But I have a sneaking suspicion:

1) Drag Queen(s)

2) Dykes on Bikes

3) Boys (or Men if they're over 35) in Leather

I suspect that variations on the theme I've laid out just above will dominate the media coverage of this year's Gay Pride. That's the way it's been for the last 10 years I've been paying attention.

But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe this year, I'll wake up to papers with a centerpiece on positive coverage of our national fight for marriage equality and rights. Maybe there will be a heartwarming story on gay adoptions, dispelling the horrible propaganda the religious right spews about single-sex child raising.

Today, I'll add my hope to see positive change in our nation's cultural fabric to my list of my Prides. Otherwise, you bitches can all come find me in another country by 2010.

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(1) Kelly, hi sexy - I think you're handsome. I'm in a committed relationship to a skinny bitch. But he loves me for me. I'm trying to learn to love my physical self. It's hard. So are losing the pounds. I'm here for you, bitch. do you love it?

(2) This post talks about another blog, a podcast, a comment on the podcast, and then the blogger's view on the topic. Go here if you want the whole story with links to the other podcast, etc. I merely used the post to get my own, opinionated juices flowing. I didn't even read the other blog, listen to the podcast, nothing.

(3) I'm a lazy fuck. LOVES IT!

(4) This non-condemnation should be carried over by the reader to be my point of view on the drag queens, dykes on bikes and leatherboys... Is that stuff for me, personally? No. Do I care if you do it? NO...please, by all means. Gina loves her some gender illusionary, lesbo-lowriders and trussed up leatherbottoms. Er... I mean boys. ;)

(5) This bear does tricks (<-- link!)